[MLB-WIRELESS] OS Fun

[Matt Pearce]

Someone has got an odd sense of humor when it comes to os's, although I would like to know what the are using now :-)

Matt.

If it requires an inflight reboot, there's no doubt what OS it's running.
Gotta be Win98. I can see the MS tech support call now..

MS Support: "Thank you for calling Microsoft Customer support. How may I
help you?"
Pilot: "Uhh.. I'm spiraling towards the earth, both my engines are out, and
my display says 'General Protection Fault' in white text on a blue
background."
MS Support: "And what is the system model?"
Pilot: "The the F-22 jet.."
MS Support: "Oh yes, there are known issues that we will not admit to with
that particular system. To temporarily fix the problem, simply reboot. Or,
if the 5 minute boot time is too long, may I personally recommend that you
eject. However, you will have to purchase another license of Windows 98 for
$1000 since jet fighter crashes are not a valid reason to receive a new
license."
Pilot: "@#$*(! Microsoft!"
MS Support: "Thank you and have a nice day!"

*****************************************
RH support: Thanks for calling Red Hat! How may we help you?
Pilot: "Uhh.. I'm spiraling towards the earth, both my engines are out, and
my display says 'kernel panic' in white text on a black background."
RH Support: "And what is the system model?"
Pilot: "The the F-22 jet.."
RH support: If you read linux-kernel-bugtraq, you will see that you should
have patched your kernel to 2.4.19-pre-alpha-revision-d before takeoff. But
no problem, this is Linux after all. Do you have another F22 on your LAN?
Just telnet in from there, su to root and restart sendmail.
Pilot: @#$*! Redhat! I'm switching to Debian if I survive!
RH support: Can I interest you in any RHAT?


*****************************************
FreeBSD support: Thanks for calling FreeBSD! How may we help you?
Pilot: "Uhh.. I'm spiraling towards the earth, both my engines are out, and
my display says 'Fatal trap 12: page fault while in kernel mode' in white
text on a black background."
FreeBSD Support: "And what is the system model?"
Pilot: "The the F-22 jet.."
FreeBSD support: No worries, just send us a full backtrace... you _did_
enable debugging information in your kernel didn't you?!
Pilot: @#$*! FreeBSD! I'm switching to OpenBSD if I survive!
FreeBSD support: RTFM!
*****************************************

pilot at airoplane:~$ su -c "apt-get install ejection-seat"
  Password:
Reading Package Lists... Done
Building Dependency Tree... Done
E: Couldn't find package ejection-seat

*****************************************


Apple support: Thanks for calling Apple! How may we help you?
Pilot: "Uhh.. I'm spiraling towards the earth, both my engines are out, and
my display says 'unresolved kernel trap' [arstechnica.com] in white text on
a black background, admittedly overlaid on very a friendly GUI. Before that,
there was a three second delay accompanied by a busy icon whenever I tried
anything."
Apple Support: "And what is the system model?"
Pilot: "The the F-22 jet.."
Apple support: Oh, sorry, we don't plan to support that hardware until
version 10.3. Can you use 10.2 Jaguar [aviationartprints.com] until then?
Pilot: @#$*! Mac! I'm switching to BeOS if I survive!
Apple support: Can I interest you in a .Mac subscription?



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